Are There Optimal Ages for a Move or Relocation?by Kori Rodley Irons | More from this Blogger 30 Dec 2007 10:58 AM One of the questions I get asked periodically by parents, particularly single parents, is if there are ages that it is "better" to move or relocate children and ages where it is less advised. It is interesting because I DO have some experience with this and my own children, we have definitely not always lived in the same place/state/city. I do not think that it is necessarily a black and white situation, however. What I do tell people is that all children and all families are different. Some kids thrive on different experiences and locations while others have a really hard time adjusting. I have both kinds of children in my own family. What I found was that my children moved and adjusted much easier when they were younger, by the middle-school ages of 11 or 12, they were no longer as resilient or interested in even moving across town--let alone a move out of state. So, that is when I made up my mind to stay put until my children were grown. They did live in three different states by the time they were in early elementary school--but once the eldest got into middle school, I knew I was going to stay put until the last one is out of high school. I found that my children were bonded and attached to me and the family unit when they were young and didn't really get interested and attached socially and community-wise until they were in 6th grade or so. I think my children gained a great deal from living in different types of places and interacting with different types of people, but there is something to be said for being settled in a community as well. It is so personal--every family is different! I think the important thing is that the parents are available and involved in helping children to adjust to any moves or relocations. This can mean putting their interests above your own and focusing on how to make the move a positive experience for your kids. This can take time and attention. I also think that as the children get older, their interests and input should be taken into account when considering a move, if possible, too. Also: Considering a Relocation for Work and Opportunity Expect Your Financial Picture to Change Learn more about Kori Rodley Irons  Bio has been removed by administrator Relevantsingle parenting tags User Comments triciarelocates (5) 03 Jan 2008 06:33 PMI just read your blog and wanted to comment on the moving kids issue. Your points are totally valid, particularly with regards to saying every kid is different; you know your own kids and how easily they adjust. I have a high school senior also, and she would have no problem with relocating, whereas her sophmore sister would not find it that easy to acclimatise to new surroundings. I have also been working professionally in the area of relocation for several years, and can quote many examples of families who have moved out to Silicon Valley with our help. Many have kids who are naturally reluctant to leave their friends and familiar surroundings, so one of our top priorities when helping them move is to find out the kids' interests first and make sure we can tell them all about their options here, whether it be soccer, lacrosse, skateboarding, sailing etc. Just showing them the Yahoo! building has brought about shouts of glee! And I remember one family whose boys were adamant they didn't want to move from North Carolina until we gave them a tour of the skateparks out here - that changed everything! So if you're thinking of moving your kids to a new area, my advice is to find an expert, whether it be a relocation service or a contact you've made, and make sure your kids' interests and questions are answered BEFORE you take them away from what they know. Community Tags developmental stages, moving, relocation Discuss this article
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