Search Results for: blog being a mentor and example to other single parents

When There Is a Void…Something Will Fill It

When we hear stories of children from single parent families getting into trouble, it is often NOT exclusively because they have one parent in the home, but there are generally other issues going on that might have been more likely to be noticed if there were two attentive parents. Other issues pop up and there may be gaps or a void. I subscribe to the opinion that if there is a void, a child will look for something to fill it… I don’t mean to say that we should strive to live perfect, ever-busy lives–but if there are big gaps … Continue reading →

Watch Out for Dependency

We single parents often wrestle with feeling the need to be TOO independent—at least that is how it has been for me. I have gotten so used to being on my own that I can very easily slip into stoicism. I do NOT find it easy to ask for, or accept help. But for some single parents, just the opposite is true—it becomes so much easier to accept help and let others take care of things, that becoming overly-dependent becomes a problem. Being encouraged and feeling a part of a supportive community and family is one thing; and it is … Continue reading →

Get People Around Your Family Who Make You Feel Supported

I wrote recently about how I think that single parents really need other single parent friends, but I also think it is really important that as a single parent family—we have people in our lives that support our family and give us the unconditional encouragement. We get enough negative messages about what is so “wrong” with single parent families from the rest of the world—most of it blindsides us and is completely unsolicited. We need some people who think we are great, think our kids are fabulous, and are not “down” on single parent families. We cannot hold up the … Continue reading →

Why Single Parents Need Other Single Parent Friends

Years ago, when I was married and had the very young children (babies and preschoolers), most of my every-day friends were other young couples. It just sort of evolved and happened that way since we had so much in common and I didn’t have so much in common with my single, unmarried and un-partnered friends any longer. As a single parent, I don’t have as many couple friends, and instead have found that my life has evolved to include more single people. This is fine, but a single parent really needs other single parent friends and not just single person … Continue reading →

Being a Mentor And Example to Other Single Parents

A few years ago, there were some commercials on television that featured sports stars and figures selling something (tennis shoes?) and the tag line was: “I am not a role model.” I remember having mixed feelings about those ads since, of course, sports figures are role models to young children, even if it reluctantly. But, I know I feel the same way about being a single parent–I know that I sometimes represent single parents everywhere and serve as an example whether I want to or not and I do feel compelled to represent single-parent families well… Depending on the world … Continue reading →

What We Can Learn From Our Childless Friends–Part Two

Yesterday, I confessed to my occasional ambivalence about the lessons I’ve learned and the things I’ve had to examine in myself when it comes to my friends who DO NOT have children. I touched on some of the lessons I’ve learned and ways that having childless friends in my world have enriched my life and I going to continue with a few more examples… My childless friends remind me that it’s okay to spend money on myself and do things I enjoy. I know this may seem incredibly obvious, by I’m betting that some of you parents understand what I … Continue reading →