Search Results for: blog dating when you both have kids part one

Bonding With the In-Laws: The Youngest Sibling

One of the weirdest things about marrying into a large family was that I’ve been around for almost the entire life of my littlest brother-in-law.  When Jon and I first started dating, and I met the family for the first time, his youngest brother was only a bit over a year old.  While he knows most of Jon’s other siblings very well, because they all lived at home with him for years (and some still do), Jon wasn’t around much when he was growing up.  So Jon, his own brother, isn’t really that much more of a presence in his … Continue reading →

How Do You Define PDA?

Recently my volunteering friends and I discussed PDA (public displays of affection).  My two friends talked about their husbands’ discomfort with PDA.  Well, I could relate to that: it tends to make a lot of people uncomfortable.  But then I learned that what they meant by PDA was hand-holding, hugs, a quick kiss. My one friend said it took her husband years before he would hold her hand in public.  The other said that when she and her husband meet up somewhere, when her husband arrives all the other women in the room get a hug, or sometimes even a … Continue reading →

Building a Healthy Co-Parenting Relationship

Getting divorced is so much more complicated when there are children involved. The marriage may be over, but this person will continue to be a part of your life for the next 18 years because of the simple fact that you have children together. This is one of the most difficult things about divorce; you get a constant reminder that your marriage failed and that you now have to share your children. Like it or not, you are tied together for life. You now have to find a way to navigate your new co-parenting relationship, which trust me, is a … Continue reading →

The New Girlfriend

One thing I never thought I would have to deal with when Hailey was born was another woman coming into her life and either trying to keep her dad away or trying to be her mom. The part about trying to be her mother doesn’t really bother me, Hailey and I have a great relationship and I figure all kids need more people to love them and care about their well being. So as far as I’m concerned my ex husbands girlfriends can exercise their maternal instinct with my daughter to their hearts content. It’s the other scenario that bugs … Continue reading →

Still A Part Of The Family

Recently I was reminded of what co parenting looks like when the entire extended family makes it work. Being a single mom I usually only look at things from my point of view but this weekend I got the chance to look at this as a relative instead of the single parent. My best friend’s son and his wife are divorced, their son is three. I think that Sarah and Tyler have done a wonderful job of co parenting their son. This little boy seems happy, well adjusted and well loved. When he is with us he is the apple … Continue reading →

How to Parent Adult Step Children

Almost thirty years ago, Robert married a woman who had five grown children. No big deal, right? They ranged in age from mid-twenties to mid-thirties, so they had all been on their own for many years. They appeared to be well-adjusted, independent, responsible adults. They lived locally, and Robert and his wife socialized with them on a regular basis. So what was the problem? It turns out that there were many, but primary among them was the fact that his wife’s family was, what the shrinks would call, enmeshed. They were ‘all up in’ one another’s business—they spoke to one … Continue reading →

He’s Got Her Wrapped Around His Little Finger!

Chase has been dating Amy, a 28 year old single mother, for over a year. Things are getting serious; they’ve even been batting around the “M” word. She is attractive, kind, funny, considerate, and they both love to fish and camp. In a nutshell, she’s everything he’s been looking for in a life partner…except for one little thing… a twenty-eight pound, 3 year old little thing, named Marcus. “Now don’t get me wrong, he’s really cute and everything” admits Chase, “but she jumps every time he cries! And I mean every time! He has totally got her wrapped around his … Continue reading →

The Doing List

I’ve got a little less than three weeks to go before I begin the first part of my Qualifying exams for my PhD. Re-reading so many books over the summer (and up to and through this typing and beyond) is both a blessing and a curse. I realize how distantly I read them the first time and how much better I understand them now (both individually and in relation to one another). At the same time the staring at a bookshelf full of books (diminishing rapidly at this point) has never been anything but intimidating and, at times, angering. Despite … Continue reading →

Should Schools Ban Cookies?

Gone are the days of celebrating your kid’s birthday in school with cupcakes and cookies. At least at my daughter’s school. Last month, administrators at my kid’s private school put the kibosh on birthday baked goods and candy. Now, the only treats your birthday boy can share in class on his big day are “fun print” napkins, pencils, Go-gurt, crackers or string cheese. Can you say party pooper? I did, until I learned that the New York City Department of Education has also banned baked goods in school. According to the New York Times, class bake sales are now banned … Continue reading →

Bad Dads? You Decide

I know a dad who pays more money for airlines tickets to see his girlfriend than he does in child support. He also willingly shells out more cash to wine and dine said girlfriend in the course of three days than he does to feed his own child in an entire month. That’s on top of repeatedly placing the child in dangerous situations and consistently ignoring the child. So, does this make the guy a bad dad? He certainly doesn’t think so, and I would venture to guess that fellow fathers Jon Gosselin and Mel Gibson would agree. The aforementioned … Continue reading →