Don't Open one Door if the Other Isn't Closed

by Michele Thorne | More from this Blogger

I have given my opinion before on single parents dating. In short, I don't see anything wrong with it as long as the children aren't seeing a parade of wo/men in their lives. One of the questions that remains is, are YOU ready for it?

We've all heard the saying "When one door closes, another opens." What happens when you're trying to open a new door and the other isn't quite closed? Some of us have heard of this happening when someone starts seeing someone new just to make their ex jealous. That's not the only time it happens though. There are some people who for whatever reason, hold onto the hopes and dreams of their past relationship. They continue to think that things will change and they will get back together with their child's father. They make excuses like, "oh, they're just going through a phase," or "They'll see what their missing and come back." Whatever the excuse, it's holding you back.

When you continue to hold onto these hopes and dreams, several things happen. First, you are not allowing the old door to close, and in turn, you are literally holding the new door shut. You are passing up so many new chances at a new life, and you don't even realize it. You may be tugging hard at the new door, thinking you want it to open, but people are sensing that you haven't truly closed the last door by the breeze they are feeling. You may be trying to start new relationships, but people can tell one way or another that you are still holding onto the past. If, by some chance you actually manage to get your foot in the door, and start a relationship with someone new, how long do you thing it will take them to feel the breeze? How long will it take them to realize you are still pining for your ex? Even if they don't realize that you are, is it truly fair to the new relationship to be caught up in the old?

What happens when you have hidden it so long that your child now knows this person in the new relationship, then this person realizes that you aren't in the relationship with them, but still in the past one, at least emotionally. Or in the same situation, your ex really does realize what he was missing and tries to come back into the picture. These scenarios aren't fair to anyone. You, your children, your ex, your new partner, or your new relationship itself. Please, do not open a new door if the other one isn't closed.

Wait To Date

Being a Single Parent and Dating

Learn more about Michele Thorne

Michele Thorne is an all purpose person. She is a full time single mom (her son's father is not involved in his life in any way, shape, or form) caring for her son Jonathan.

View Full Profile | More from this Blogger