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How to Cope with an Empty Nest

Your “baby” has grown up, started college, and moved away to live in a dorm or apartment. This experience can leave parents with a mix of strong emotions. It also requires adjustments in how you and your college student relate to each other, and alters what your day-to-day life is like. Here are some ways to cope with an Empty Nest. Allow Yourself to Feel Whatever Emotions Appear A national survey done in 2013 by Clark University of over 1,000 parents found that 84% missed their kids once they moved out. 60% of parents said they were glad to have … Continue reading →

Prelude To An Empty Nest

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Friday. For so long it was my favorite day. Friday meant I got to spend two full, uninterrupted days with my family. Since my divorce, Friday has become something else entirely. Every other Friday morning I kiss my daughter good bye, knowing that her father will pick her up before I get off work and it will be two long days before I see her again. I try to drag the work day out. Searching for unfinished projects that need my immediate attention. Anything to make the work day as long as possible and delay going home to an empty … Continue reading →

The Empty Nest Syndrome (2)

In the previous article on the empty nest syndrome we looked at the grieving process that often accompanies the departure of an adult child from the family home. This phenomenon commonly occurs when the oldest child leaves, as that represents a break in the family circle. It is also common when the youngest or last child leaves home, as that signifies that the active role of parenting is effectively over. In households with only one child, the parent experiences the full force of the eldest, middle and youngest child leaving in one powerfully emotive hit. In the latter scenario, the … Continue reading →

Chasing Them Out of the Nest

I feel myself shifting gears—without really making a conscious attempt, I find that I am changing from being the protective, nurturing parent of dependent children to nudging and pushing them as they prepare to leave the nest. I never would have imagined that I would be both ready and understanding of my children’s inevitable departure, but it seems almost biological. I feel like one of those animal mothers who, when the time comes, runs her children out of the next so that they can begin to live life on their own. My kids and I have started to joke about … Continue reading →

Empty Nest Syndrome for the Single Parent

Empty Nest Syndrome is a difficult time for any parent but for the single parent, it can be an exciting but also heartbreaking time. I remember when my daughter was 18. Just two weeks after her birthday, she decided to move out. Although my son was still at home at the age of 20 while attending a nearby university, I was devastated. I remember thinking that she was so young and just not ready but she was legally an adult and it was her right. Although I tried to talk her out of going, she had her mind made up. … Continue reading →

There is No Time Limit to Grieving

During the time that I was writing the series of articles on the Empty Nest Syndrome, I came across a comment on a pseudo-medical site which suggested some rather bizarre but also quite dangerous advice on how to deal with this phenomenon. As we discussed in previous articles on the empty nest syndrome, this situation arises when either the first child leaves home or more commonly, when the last child moves out of the family home. Although fathers can and do experience the symptoms of the empty nest syndrome, it is most common amongst mothers, who traditionally do most of … Continue reading →

Making Plans for When the Children are Gone

There was a time not so long ago when I could not for the life of me imagine a life without children in my house. As a long-time single parent, so much of my time, resources, energy and budget have gone to supporting and caring for my children and it has definitely given my life grounding and purpose. The end is on the horizon, however, and while I will always be a mom and I know that I will continue to be a part of my kids’ lives, I have also started to realize that there is going to be … Continue reading →

The House that Fills and Empties

I realized this morning that my family scene is forever fluctuating–the house empties out, gradually fills, or fills to bursting in a very short time. It is not a quiet and predictable place most days, but it is also not as chaotic and loud as it used to be when my children were younger. There are elements of unpredictability about it now, but there is also an ebb and flow that living in a house with older teenagers brings… When my children were younger, we had very organized parenting agreements between their father–they would be with me during the weeks … Continue reading →