Search Results for: blog recognizing options

Talk to Kids about Options and Choices

It is one thing to give our kids plenty of opportunities to make choices and problem-solve on their own, but as they get older we can also help them develop into independent thinkers and build self confidence by talking over with them different options and choices that are and will be available to them. I find that as my kids get older, they have a genuine interest in the world around them and they need to talk through and explore all the options that might be available out there for them. After all, they often have no idea all the … Continue reading →

Recognizing Options

The other day I was talking with another single parent and she said “I’d do something different if I could, but I just have no other options!” Of course, it is seldom the case that we only have one option—BUT, I think that as single parents we can get to a place where we feel as though our options are so limited we really have run out of choices. Perhaps this is just a single parent’s version of “can’t see the forest for the trees” but I do think that we can give ourselves a break by recognizing that we … Continue reading →

Ask a Marriage Blogger: Do You Know Where Civil Unions Came From?

I was hoping you wouldn’t mind answering a question about civil unions. You’ve referred to them in a few of your blogs and I was curious as to where this term came from? To be honest, it seems like in the last couple of years this issue is suddenly the front page everywhere and I don’t honestly recall where it came from. I get the impression I may be on the fringe of the issue, I’m divorced and considering remarrying a lovely woman that I’ve been seeing for some time now. Can you help me out here? – Curious George … Continue reading →

New York Covers Same-Sex Spouses for Health Insurance

Posted on by

New York has become the sixth state to legalize same-sex marriage. This means that same-sex married couples in New York will now be eligible to have their health insurance cover their spouse, (just like opposite-sex married couples are able to do). Coverage options may not be completely the same in all cases, however. One of the benefits that married couples enjoy is the ability to have their health insurance policy cover their spouse, as well as themselves. This is often much less expensive than it would be to pay for two completely separate health insurance plans. Having health insurance coverage … Continue reading →

When it is a Good Idea to Ask Yourself “What If?”

We have many of us heard that asking the “what if” question can be a trap; it CAN be a way of focusing too much on stuff that could happen and not enough on the present. Many experts will warn those of us who get stuck wondering what could happen to let go of those thoughts and try to get grounded in the present. I would like to argue, however, that asking the “What IF?” question can be a way of getting inspired and growth-focused for our home businesses. What if you expanded your business and started gathering customers in … Continue reading →

Kinship Adoption and Its Advantages

Naturally, all adoptions are about creating real kinship relationships, but the term “kinship adoption” refers to members of the extended birth family assuming a parental role. Most often, the kinship adopter is a grandmother. The next most common kinship adopter is an aunt. (The term kinship adoption is not referring to the common situation of a stepparent adopting his/her partner’s child. This process is usually referred to as “second parent adoption”.) There are many advantages to kinship adoption. The most obvious advantage is that, if the relatives are known to the child, the move will be much less traumatic than … Continue reading →

Holiday Visitors and the Single Parent Family

Visiting is a HUGE part of what the holiday season is all about—whether it is traveling over the river and through the woods for an old-fashioned family meal, or a cocktail party for coworkers and colleagues, most of us are called up to step up our social lives from mid-November until January 1st. For a single parent family, hosting parties, putting up holiday visitors, and even coordinating childcare for other social outings during this busy season can be a real challenge! Many of you know that I have three children and they all have very different temperaments. When they were … Continue reading →

Building Up Your Reserves

So often we single parents are living day-to-day, paycheck-to-paycheck. Things can feel precarious and it takes all of our focus and energy just to get through this day as it is, let alone plan for the future. While, I do think we need to fuss and worry less and that it is important to learn how to live in the present, I also think that having some “reserves” can actually help us to relax and enjoy today more. When I write about reserves, I’m not just talking about a fat savings account (although that would be really nice, wouldn’t it?)—I … Continue reading →

Focus on What You DO Have

The life of a single parent can be one of “lack”—we might be living on a tight budget, in a world where time is scarce and we just don’t feel like we have enough. This can be a trap, however, and we can get stuck in this “not enough” place. The anecdote is to focus on all the things and experiences we DO have, and take appreciative stock of where we are. So, single parent comrade, what is going well? What do you have that you can be appreciatively thankful for? Your child? Home? Health? A playful and healthy pet? … Continue reading →

Don’t Give In To “What If”

I think that “what ifs” can be the downfall of many of us—but they can really get a single parent off track. Getting caught up in worry, anxiety, self-doubt and wondering “what if” over everything that happens can keep us from being productive and happy in the way our lives are now. What if the child support payment doesn’t come? What if I have to work overtime? What if my child gets sick and can’t go to day care? What if I have to take that transfer? What if I can’t get into the classes I want? What if I … Continue reading →