Search Results for: blog single parents still have choices

Don’t Judge My Choices Until You Live My Life

Is there anyone who hasn’t heard about the horrific shooting in Colorado? Friday at work it was all anyone could talk about and as fellow blogger pointed out in her blog, Watch Where You Point That Finger, everyone had an opinion about people taking their children to the movies in the first place. Apparently those people have never been single parents. Or maybe they’ve never been any type of parent but I know, as a single parent, sometimes, midnight showings are your best friend. If your kids are young, you hope they will sleep through the movie. As a single … Continue reading →

Parents Play a Pivotal Role in Reducing Teen Pregnancy

In the midst of a debate over the best way to lower teen pregnancy rates, whether it is through teaching abstinence or informing teens about the risks of sexually transmitted diseases and methods of birth control, the story of an eleven-year-old girl giving birth to a baby, to me screams, “neither is working!” The fact is, teachers can preach and teach until they are blue in the face, but until parents take initiative in teaching their own children about sex, teen pregnancy is not going anywhere. Teens are constantly being bombarded with images of teen sexuality in television, movies, books … Continue reading →

There Can Be Risk in All Sorts of Choices

As single parents, many of us often find ourselves trying to do anything we can to minimize and reduce risk. After all, life can feel so precarious much of the time and any safety and security we can create really feels like a good thing. I do think it is important to remember, however, that we have to step outside that safety zone if we are going to stimulate growth and accept the inevitable changes. Most choices—even the best and safest ones—have an element of risk… Let us think this thing through—think of times when you have made a change … Continue reading →

Balancing Decisions and Choices (Yours and Theirs)

I tend to write fairly often about decisions and choices—the importance of letting our children learn how to make decisions and take chances on their own instead of our doing everything for them as parents. I realize, however, that there has to be some balance between our making decisions and choices as parents, and our child’s making decisions and choices too… In my experience as a parent—and most of that time as a single parent—I have learned that when I start to feel resentment and completely overwhelmed, then things are likely out of balance. While I want my kids to … Continue reading →

Boundaries 101 For Older Kids (and Their Parents)

I tend to write about my personal “boundary” philosophies when it comes to parenting now and again. The reality is that I find this subject comes up again and again when I am talking with friends. They may not realize that their “problem” with their kids is really about setting boundaries—but it often is. And, it doesn’t stop when kids grow up and move out—in fact I have found with my friends with older kids (in their 20’s and 30’s)—the boundary issues can be even stronger and more of a struggle! As usual, I want to clarify that I am … Continue reading →

Starting a Single Parent Support Group: Where

Ok, now you are interested in joining/starting a single parent support group, and you have a list of people who are interested in joining your support group. You are just itching to get this whole thing rolling. Now what? Or should I say where? Where are you going to go to have your meetings? There are several choices available, it all depends on your comfort level and preferences. Let’s take a look at some of them. The first and most straight forward choice would be at member/s homes. Is there one person who would be willing to have the meetings … Continue reading →

Challenge for Single Parents—Balancing Nurturing and Getting Things Done

While all parents have to find a way to be the best and most effective parent possible, a single parent does have some more intense challenges, or at least challenges that can be more of a juggling game. Since we are called upon to play all the roles and be provider, housekeeper, and parent, we have to find a way to balance our practical, responsible side, with the loving nurturing that our kids require and deserve. I can really get caught up in just keeping things going. With three kids, a small business to run and a more “traditional” job … Continue reading →

Single Parents Still Have Choices

For some reason, many single parents seem to feel as though their life is happening without their consent—that they no longer have any choices and each day is just a series of “have to dos.” In reality, even though life may not have turned out how you expected, you are still in control and you do still have plenty of choices. I think that given in to the feeling that you’ve run out of choices can contribute to depression and a feeling of helplessness. I definitely know what it feels like to suddenly be in a situation as a single … Continue reading →

Do You Worry What Other Parents Think?

I admit that I am only a partially-evolved person—particularly when it comes to my parenting. I DO let myself worry sometimes what other parents think—think of my children’s behavior, my housekeeping, my single-parenthood—even though I can usually talk myself out of it and through it, I have felt the self-consciousness of wondering what the other parents on the sidelines were saying about one of my children… I don’t think this makes me a bad or overly sensitive parent. In fact, I think it makes me pretty normal. We are all doing the best we can and even the most seasoned … Continue reading →

Dads are Important, Too!

A few months ago, a book was released that emphasized the important role that dads have. It is possible that the book may have influenced some parents to take a moment and think about the importance of dads and whether society might need to update its idea of what dads can do. Let me begin by clearly stating that I think that both dads and moms are very important to their children. Each can have a very strong influence. Whether that influence is positive or negative depends largely on the individual choices each parent makes. A book called Do Fathers … Continue reading →