Taking the Focus Off Ourselves for a While

by Kori Rodley Irons | More from this Blogger

25 Dec 2007 05:48 PM

Perhaps because I write so much about what is going on in my own little world, I often feel like I get pretty myopic. As a single parent, I might also be hypersensitive about myself and my life because I feel like I have to pay such close attention to make sure nothing falls through the cracks. That is probably why I think it can be so great to be able to let all that go for a while and focus on people and problems OUTSIDE my family and my little domestic scene. Getting out of my own world and paying attention to how things are for others feels incredibly healthy and healing...

Of course there are those of us who can go too far the other way and spend so much time on other people's problems, that we keep from facing our own--but I personally think that the single parents I know are more in my camp--we are so focused on holding our families together we forget to look out into the world and see there are people having a harder time, friends who could use our support, or even a world of events and activities going on that have absolutely nothing to do with us and our family situation.

For me, if I call a friend and ask them about their lives with no intention of talking about my own; go out to lunch with someone in order to be there for them--not looking for support for my world; even volunteering or getting involved in a cause without thinking about how it is going to benefit me. I know some of these things seem pretty simple, but for a single parent focusing on home, family, finances, and future--getting our heads out of our own worlds for even a little while can be challenging! Instead of always looking to build our support systems, it might be well worth it for us to figure out how we can be a part of someone else's too.

Also: There are So Many Things I Can't Relate Too Anymore

Staying Open When We're Tempted to do Just the Opposite

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