The Present Box

by Angel Lynn Diamond | More from this Blogger

03 Jun 2009 10:27 AM

In a traditional family and an occasion arises that presents are called for, the other parent steps up to the plate, usually, and takes the child shopping for the celebratory parent. They might also help them to make a gift and/or a pretty card for the event. There is no problem. In a nontraditional family without the mother/father thing happening, the grandparents most likely will take over this responsibility for the absent parent. What happens when there is no other parent or grandparent? What about a friend or another close relative? You might not have that either. What next?

First of all, the best gifts in life are the ones that you create yourself. Teach your child this so that he or she does not grow up thinking that life is all about money and presents. Your child probably knows that it is a special occasion depending on their age. They want to give you something, but they are too young to get it themselves. You could help them make it or buy it, but then that takes something away from the whole idea in a way.

I have found that a really nice thing to do is to create a present box. Throughout the year gifts that the parent picks out for themselves or that the child picks out for his parent while out on various shopping trips are placed into a box. In the meantime, the child is earning money doing jobs around the house and receives his allowance for his normal everyday job duties and responsibilities. When the occasion comes up that a gift is needed for his single parent he can take the box into his room and shut the door. He can then "shop" from this box. His price is $2.00 or whatever you deem appropriate for any item in the box. If he or she selects three items they will owe you $6.00. The child feels as if he or she is shopping by themselves and also paying for it. Include gift bags in this box also so that they can "wrap" it themselves.

You will see just how great this works out when you see the look of joy and pride as they present to you their gift that they chose all by themselves.

Angel Lynn writes in weight loss, single parenting, and health.

Learn more about Angel Lynn Diamond

I am a mom to my precious one and only, a nurse in a heartwarming adult living facility, and a freelance writer.

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Brandy Becerra (15) 13 Jun 2009 03:58 PM

I agree that it is perfectly fine for one parent to help a child or children make something for the parent that does not live with them, but I do feel that some problems with this can still occur with the confusion to the children. I am in this situation and I always make sure my ex husband has gifts for christmas, birthdays, fathers day, and valentines day, but he never does the same for me. My kids are confused and get upset about this because like you have stated in your article; they dont have a ways of means to buy something for me. It would be so nice if families that were divorced would always be on the same page on things like this so the kids minds are at ease in all aspects and situations.

Angel Lynn Diamond (224) 13 Jun 2009 05:04 PM

Hi Brandy, That is too bad. I am sorry that your ex is not as considerate as you are. It makes it hard for the kids. I was in a different situation and this was the only solution that I could come up with. It worked pretty well for us. With an ex, however, you should not have to do that. Have you tried explaining all of this to him? Parents, whether divorced or married should be doing this out of respect for the other parent, I believe. Maybe you can talk to him about this and explain that the children are being affected by it. I will pray for your situation and hope that this will resolve for you and the kids. Blessings.