When You Don't Know What to Do...Wait...

by Kori Rodley Irons | More from this Blogger

03 Oct 2007 01:36 PM

We single parents are quite used to making decisions under pressure and rising to the challenges that present themselves. But, there are those times when we may be at our wit's end; we don't know what to do about a particular parenting issue, a financial consideration, or whether to move, take a new job, start dating, whatever. As the solo adult decision-maker in our families, we might be tempted to put a lot of pressure on ourselves to make a great decision or choice YESTERDAY. Instead, when obvious answers don't present themselves right away, ease up, take a break, and wait...

I am not advocating shunning one's responsibilities, but there are those times when the answers just aren't coming and focusing too much isn't helping. Personally, I believe there is some merit to sleeping on things or setting a moratorium on fussing-say for three days-and then coming back to the problem. This wasn't something I learned how to do until I was a single parent. Not having another adult to talk things over with or help with problem-solving can cause us to put a great deal of pressure on our own abilities. Have you heard that saying "a watched pot never boils?" Well, I think too much pressure can make it extra-hard for a single parent to see the forest for the trees.

So, when things get overwhelming and you have maxed yourself out on problem-solving; when you just can't figure out what to do-take a break and wait. Either the problem or issue will still be there when you come back to it, or it will dissolve on its own without your fussing and focusing. Either way, a single parent has to reserve his or her energy and strength for all the OTHER problems that present themselves!

Also: Don't Take On Too Much!

How Realistic Are Your Expectations?

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